Sunday, April 10, 2011

Sketchy Kate

Sketched in sketchbook pro and then cunningly added to a paper texture to make it look like it was sketched in a physical book used for sketching, possibly know as a sketchbook, I have sketched this sketch of a woman with a sketchy future.
It's a sketch.
Last week I had to explain to the head of the visual art department of the polytech closest to me that I used a wacom tablet and various digital painting software to create these little gems. You would have thought I was actually speaking Braille if you had seen the look on her face.
"So you, you actually draw these? By hand?"
"Yes, I sketch them in sketchbook pro and then paint them in painter."
"Oh so you do draw them in a sketchbook first?"
"No I draw them in sketchbook pro which is a piece of software."
This is the HOD of a place that teaches digital illustration and I'm explaining what a wacom tablet is. It's not a wonder that people on trademe get confused when I try and sell prints. "It's a print, of a sketch, that was sketched in the computer... Just like a regular sketch, only done in the computer, not  on paper. "
Anyhow this is Kate. Quite possible the stupidest woman on planet earth. And when you take into account all those American socialite bimbos who don't seem to know how to wear underpants despite the fact that the paparazzi  are actively walking around with mirrors on their shoes, that's going up against some pretty stiff competition.
I'm curious what her family thinks about her impending inclusion in the royal family. What I'm really curious about is why no one has sat her down, slapped her really hard and asked "Are you out of your fucking mind?" I mean seriously, look at the consequences of marrying into that family. Sure it starts out nice enough, a few streets get blocked off to accommodate the royal wedding and it's televised so there little to no chance of everyone you ever knew getting to see how nicely your wedding dress looks and someone else is footing the bill which always helps and marrying royalty takes wedding presents into a whole new realm of thinking. I know that New Zealand's prime minister is even now trying to figure a way to give them his first born as a wedding present. (John Key and Prince William have the same hairstyle, interesting fact there. Write it down, memorize it. Impress your friends at parties.)
But after that it goes downhill pretty damn quickly and ends with either shilling for a diet centre or  blocking off that same set of streets to accommodate your funeral.
Really I'm just jealous.
I could have made Prince William happy.
And my wedding dress would have looked stunning.
Ha! That's be a post stamp for the ages.

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